That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
