All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
