windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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