She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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