I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I want to make a zoo with you.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
