I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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