I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
