she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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