words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
