I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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