never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Randomize