Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
