Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Edward fifth and chaser hands
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
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