just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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