Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
