I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize