Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize