I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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