i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
