i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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