all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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