i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
