I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
This is the high leading the old right now
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
