Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
it's not cheating when I paid for it
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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