u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
