And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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