that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
He kissed a someone with a penis
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize