and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
