Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize
