I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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