I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
