is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
