if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
