Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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