Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
