dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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