STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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