I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
