Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
