And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
