would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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