Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
