I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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