WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I DEMAND FORESKIN
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
