Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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