How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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