and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
