did you get engaged???
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
