I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
