question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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